When I look up at myself in the mirror I see puffy eyes with dark circles surrounding them stare back at me. There I see a girl with pale skin, dull and tired eyes, dark circles around her eyes, and some pimples and acne mark decorating her face. Though her demeanour is dull and tired, her eyes are speaking volumes. There is something about her face that makes me feel proud of her. Nowadays everyone is hiding behind a mask. Whether the mask is of makeup or facade. Even I opt for hiding my real self, being too scared to let the world know of my weaknesses. But it isn’t so bad to adore your scars and wounds and feel proud of them, when alone. Not everyone is matured enough to celebrate their scars. Not everyone gets the chance to look at themselves and feel like “yeah, I fought some battles and won over it or at least I m still trying “. Maybe this is the reason, when I look up at myself in the mirror the serenity and beauty oozing out of the flaws of my face staring back at me dumbstruck’s me. Maybe it isn’t so bad to fight over the insecurities you have for your self. It’s beautiful to overcome the hatred you have for yourself for the mistakes you did. Maybe it isn’t so bad to like your real self at times. #its not bad to love yourself.
It isn’t wrong to fail. It isn’t wrong to fear. It isn’t wrong to feel vulnerable and weak, But not trying to overcome them is.
Someone doesn’t become great by not failing but by taking that one step towards success after felling down, after getting hurt.
There will always be ups and downs because this is life and this is how it is meant to be. But life is dynamic it will keep on changing its phases. Just like good times even bad times won’t last, they will pass away, we just have to hang on and keep trying.
The moment we take a step towards trying is the moment we win 70% of the battle.
Even after achieving what we want in life, we will have to face problems, we will have to face hurdles, but taking a step towards overcoming them, passing through them is what will make us great.
At the end it’s all about that one step we take towards success after failing.
‘Perspective’ such a strong word, but we never try to measure its depth. We are too amateur to understand it’s heterogeneity. If we match in this orbit we are best of friends. If we don’t we are enemies for life. We don’t understand that the same figure which is 6 for us could be ‘9’ for the person standing in front. Without thinking about others we start expecting them to understand us and want them to follow the same mindset as us. Without giving a damn about what they might have experienced, which walk of life they might have come along we just know that we are correct and we want others to accept that as well. Just because we have different perspectives it doesn’t mean that we are right and the other person is wrong or vice versa. We both can be right or wrong at the same time. What we see and most importantly how we see is an outcome of what we have experienced or how broad is our vision. It’s not bad to try to put ourselves in someone else’s shoes and look at the situation. Who knows while doing so, we might see the unseen.
Sleep has never been a problem for me. I use to sleep continuously for 12-16 hours a day. I use to think that this must be because of tiredness and fatigue. People use to entitle me as lazy, sleepyhead, and whatnot. Even I use to think the same about myself. Even after sleeping so much tiredness and fatigue were permanent residents of mine. I thought this might be because of study load and tiring work. But never gave a thought about already exhausted and drained mind of mine. Maybe because I was never introduced to the term “hypersomnia”. Even after I came to know about it I use to be so scared to actually acknowledge it. I started running away from the truth. Not wanting to accept that I was already too deep into the illness. But you know that’s where the trouble begins. Acceptance plays a vital role in overcoming it. Unless and until you accept it’s existence and actuality you wouldn’t be able to fight it. This taught me one thing that we cannot fight or overcome something without accepting its existence. The first and foremost step to fight any mental illness or distress is to get ourselves out of the clutches of denial. On a serious note, it is not going to be easy. But life was never meant to be a walk in the park. So tighten your seat belt and fight against it.
Dear Society, As going with the saying “Pen is mightier than the sword” I think maybe my words could do the job of piercing through your rusted mentality and enlighten you guys with things going around better than any violence or protest ever could. There are things going on out there that might not bother you guys but could lend someone in life and death situation. Depression and anxiety are not less than cancer. Now moving forward to the enlightenment part, I guess it’s okay if you guys stop discriminating between boys and girls regarding their right to education and being ambitious. How about treating everyone as humans? I think its completely all right for men to cry their tears out, to be sensitive, and feel emotions. It’s normal to not be “Men don’t cry” self. How about treating everyone as humans? I think it wouldn’t harm you guys to stop being racist. Choosing acquaintances and friends based on their skin tone, caste, race, etc etc is totally insanely ridiculous. Is their skin tone so intensely dark that the light emitting from their soul couldn’t reach your heart? How about treating everyone as humans? It is completely all right to reduce your cruelty a bit, and not expect each and everyone around you to be perfect size zero. Body shaming is it? How about being shameful of your mentality. “Hey look at him, he is so girlish” “hahaha I know its creepy” so easy to comment, so easy to bash someone for their behavior, for their sexual orientation. It is as natural to be LGBT as the sun, rain, and mountains. They are also a part of us, we don’t have to alienate them. Just because someone is different from you, doesn’t make that person bad because in a way we all are different from each other. There is a huge diversity among us, but that is our beauty. Diversity is why you are you and I am me. Let’s celebrate the diversity we have. Let’s celebrate and learn from our differences. Let’s broaden our perspective. Let’s treat every creature on this planet with compassion. Universe is big enough to have place for every kind of life. Let’s enlarge our hearts and minds and give place to everyone. “Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam” it means the whole world is one big family. “UNITY in DIVERSITY”. For now, I would like to end it here. I am very grateful that you paid your attention and read this. I hope when you read this, you were free-minded and not biased by any situation. Namaste(Greetings in hindi).
So finally today I accept one big fat truth about myself. So far I have been just underrating my feelings for this certain someone. I have been so into denying the actuality of my emotions that I couldn’t interpret that, me denying it won’t change the truth. It is about that particular person who was with me when no one was. The first person ever to acknowledge my “real self” behind my facade. The one who is, one of the reasons behind my present unyielding deterministic self. The one who taught me self worth. The one who made me realize that it isn’t wrong to do things for yourself. It isn’t wrong to “love” yourself. I never knew while teaching me how to love myself, he would also slip the passcode of loving him, to me. He was an extrovert, I was an introvert. He was outgoing and bubbly, I was someone who used to find comfort in myself. He was confident and bold, I was someone who couldn’t stop doubting my worth. He used to joke around, I only knew how to laugh to hide my inner crying self. He was someone full of positivity, I was someone full of insecurities. He used to understand my unspoken words, I was someone who could never say anything out loud. He was a ray of sunshine, I was an abode for darkness. He was everything I could ever need or ask for. Today I am someone who is brave enough to challenge the challenges of life,” he” plays a very vital role in that. It’s been years still, he has his place in my heart. His mere glimpse is enough to leave me jittery. I don’t know what destiny has in store for me but I would like to thank him for everything he did for me. For being a friend, a companion, for being a family in himself, and lastly thanks for being an angel in disguise. Maybe it wasn’t in our destiny to be together. But I would always be grateful that “he” happened.